Choose wisely, oh mankind, the stories and secrets that we keep For by our choices, we may awaken, or just die alone and asleep —-Bruce Paullin Our lives are like a story that we write to ourselves. Enhanced meaning and joy accompanies us when the sagas of others can be Read more…
Truth, My Friendship With Marty, Seizures, and Death Life Is Better With You What value is a story, if it is never told? What value is love, if it is never shared? What is the value of speaking, if nobody is even willing to listen? According to the introduction Read more…
Psychedelics, Healing Potential, and Religious/Spiritual Experience I debated whether to place this chapter in the “Damaged” section, or the “Healing and Recovery” section of this book. It all depends on the state of mind, and intentions, of the person using the chemicals whether such an experience is to be considered Read more…
PART ONE: INDIVIDUAL CONSCIOUSNESS Conspiracy of Silence —-(definition from Wikipedia) An agreement, either formal or tacit, between two or more parties not to discuss some matter nor to reveal any information concerning it, especially in order to avoid blame, embarrassment, or other discomfort. “Our lives begin to end, the moment Read more…
We will either heal together as a country, as a world, and as individuals, or we will all die alone —–Bruce Paullin PART 2: THE PATH THROUGH COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS In this time when the anti-Christ seems to rule the United States, and when heartless terrorists, capitalists, and politicians victimize our Read more…
It has been said by friends and family that, at times, I have created quite the unique life experience for myself, though it certainly was not newsworthy or extraordinary in any obvious ways. I would now like to write about this life that I have come to know, Read more…
This was one of those most disturbing and amazing days in American history, as well as with my own personal history. Many citizens of our country had their hopes and dreams dashed, with the 7 American heroes who died 31 years ago today. Had it not been for an overly Read more…
I am feeling a little challenged this morning. The challenge comes from being fully present for a married couple we have known and loved for a generation. A “two months to live” diagnosis for the husband, coupled with the wife’s obsessive compulsive nature to prove her own worth, and Read more…
. The intersection of family history and a birth in November of 1955 has created some interesting, and, at times, amazing stories for me. My Uncle Worth died in February of 1955, 9 months in advance of my own birth. His photo is included here. He was married to a Read more…
As I lie here on our driveway, and pet and caress our cat Patches, I marvel at the mystery of love and connection, and the diversity of life that expresses it, each in its own unique way. I also reflect on the life, and the death, of my friend. As Read more…
I never knew what I was getting involved with when I offered to you all of my heart in friendship this year, having withheld so much of myself over the years. 2017 was the year when I finally learned how closely two male human beings could connect, and ultimately become Read more…
“As you have been with me in life, so I will be with you in death.” I “heard” this statement in my heart, and whispered it to Marty’s body at his graveside service Saturday morning, with Jo and Jim accompanying me to his graveside. Dad’s caregiver called me to Read more…
I have had an anxiety reaction recently. This is difficult to talk about, as I have always considered myself such a “together” person, especially since I began conscientiously practicing recovery from alcoholism in 1987. Right now, I have a tight throat, and I am a bit dizzy, and easily irritated Read more…
Death is a short-term, medium term, and an eternity event. The sense of loss at losing my ability to walk, to run, to bike, to participate in group activities, to get up off of the couch without worrying about permanently damaging what little healing that I have accrued since my Read more…
We visited Mom and Dad’s grave site today for the first time since dad’s death. (Rocky and Peaches are buried with them, too). One of Dad’s favorite expressions about people who get ignored, rejected or neglected was that “he got the bum’s rush”. His dementia in the last years of Read more…
I am deeply disturbed by the present developments within our shared world, within my individual and our collective human consciousness, and the points of connection between the self and other, through language, religion, and philosophies that create oppression, repression, and personal and social disease. Starting within myself, I have seen Read more…
I never chose this uneven life path of recovery from trauma, life chose it for me. I choose how to deal with the sights along the way, however. The amygdala in our brains under duress from trauma creates new paths, leading in unhealthy directions, when these issues that arise Read more…
After the recent death of my father, on September 16th, I have had the privilege and challenge of going through and sorting a lifetime worth of writings and papers from my parents, and from myself. After reading some of my mother’s personal writings, I was struck by the pain that Read more…
Marty, You are quite welcome. I anticipate that the process will take a bit of time to work so that it is apparent to you. Daily, or hourly, practice might be appropriate, unless your spirit tells you otherwise. We are all blessed by our sharing last evening, so thanks Read more…
LIFE IS BETTER WITH YOU Sharon White, Anne LaBorde, and myself attended the Michael Franti and Spearhead concert Saturday evening. Sharon and I look forward to his concert every year, as he is the musical advocate for all that we embrace with our hearts and soul. Sharing this common Read more…