Choose wisely, oh mankind, the stories and secrets that we keep For by our choices, we may awaken, or just die alone and asleep —-Bruce Paullin Our lives are like a story that we write to ourselves. Enhanced meaning and joy accompanies us when the sagas of others can be Read more…
But you can’t get to any of these truths by sitting in a field smiling beatifically, avoiding your anger and damage and grief. Your anger and damage and grief are the way to the truth. We don’t have much truth to express unless we have gone into those rooms and Read more…
Truth, My Friendship With Marty, Seizures, and Death Life Is Better With You What value is a story, if it is never told? What value is love, if it is never shared? What is the value of speaking, if nobody is even willing to listen? According to the introduction Read more…
Powerlessness and silence go together. We … should use our privileged positions not as a shelter from the world’s reality, but as a platform from which to speak. A voice is a gift. It should be cherished and used. —- Margaret Atwood There has been an epidemic of white middle-aged Read more…
Anxiety, Marijuana, and the Path Towards Healing This chapter is directed towards the developing minds, and hearts, of all ages, who as yet have not achieved the fulfillment of their physical and emotional growth processes. It has been established that the use of marijuana by human beings under the age Read more…
Psychedelics, Healing Potential, and Religious/Spiritual Experience I debated whether to place this chapter in the “Damaged” section, or the “Healing and Recovery” section of this book. It all depends on the state of mind, and intentions, of the person using the chemicals whether such an experience is to be considered Read more…
PART ONE: INDIVIDUAL CONSCIOUSNESS Conspiracy of Silence —-(definition from Wikipedia) An agreement, either formal or tacit, between two or more parties not to discuss some matter nor to reveal any information concerning it, especially in order to avoid blame, embarrassment, or other discomfort. “Our lives begin to end, the moment Read more…
We will either heal together as a country, as a world, and as individuals, or we will all die alone —–Bruce Paullin PART 2: THE PATH THROUGH COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS In this time when the anti-Christ seems to rule the United States, and when heartless terrorists, capitalists, and politicians victimize our Read more…
I am feeling a little challenged this morning. The challenge comes from being fully present for a married couple we have known and loved for a generation. A “two months to live” diagnosis for the husband, coupled with the wife’s obsessive compulsive nature to prove her own worth, and Read more…
As I lie here on our driveway, and pet and caress our cat Patches, I marvel at the mystery of love and connection, and the diversity of life that expresses it, each in its own unique way. I also reflect on the life, and the death, of my friend. As Read more…
I never knew what I was getting involved with when I offered to you all of my heart in friendship this year, having withheld so much of myself over the years. 2017 was the year when I finally learned how closely two male human beings could connect, and ultimately become Read more…
“As you have been with me in life, so I will be with you in death.” I “heard” this statement in my heart, and whispered it to Marty’s body at his graveside service Saturday morning, with Jo and Jim accompanying me to his graveside. Dad’s caregiver called me to Read more…
I have had an anxiety reaction recently. This is difficult to talk about, as I have always considered myself such a “together” person, especially since I began conscientiously practicing recovery from alcoholism in 1987. Right now, I have a tight throat, and I am a bit dizzy, and easily irritated Read more…
I was asked on my birthday in 2017 what my most “memorable” birthday was, and here, to the best of my recollection, is an account of the near death experience.. I was 21 years old, and my best friend at that time, Dan Dietz (RIP), and John Durkin, went Read more…
I first met Marie Schmidt, a diminutive old woman in her late eighties, in July of 1987. She hosted a weekly meeting at the downtown YWCA, which she played one hour tapes every Sunday, since 1961. I had seen a simple advertisement for her tape group, while attending the International Read more…
This story is a thumbnail sketch of my relationship with Randy, and with the recovery process from the human condition, including my suffering, isolation, insanity, loneliness, and ALCOHOLISM AND DRUG ADDICTION). Friends and family, there is nothing new here, so please do not feel obligated to read this again, I Read more…
I am deeply disturbed by the present developments within our shared world, within my individual and our collective human consciousness, and the points of connection between the self and other, through language, religion, and philosophies that create oppression, repression, and personal and social disease. Starting within myself, I have seen Read more…
Grandfather Great Spirit, A Story Of Recovery On March 22, 1987, I finally made the decision to live. My grandparents provided their loving presences, and home, for me for four days, while I detoxified from sixteen years of drug abuse and alcoholism. Over the course of my lifetime, they had Read more…
LIFE IS BETTER WITH YOU Sharon White, Anne LaBorde, and myself attended the Michael Franti and Spearhead concert Saturday evening. Sharon and I look forward to his concert every year, as he is the musical advocate for all that we embrace with our hearts and soul. Sharing this common Read more…
July 24, 2017 I am feeling a little challenged this morning. The challenge comes from being fully present for a married couple we have known and loved for a generation. A “two months to live” diagnosis for the husband, coupled with the wife’s obsessive compulsive nature to prove her Read more…