In this time when the anti-Christ seems to rule the United States, and when heartless terrorists and politicians victimize our most innocent of beings, human and animal, it can be difficult to feel the miracle of life that is constantly with us. Yet, to not have that experience, is to live a life devoid of much of the greater meaning available to us as human beings.
In honor of a miracle that I experienced 30 years ago today, I am reposting my spiritual experience of May 24, 1987. It is a deeply personal event, and I only rarely speak of it because of my own need for privacy, as well as so few people presently in my life’s social circle have expressed any continued interest in, or sought my present understanding of, that aspect of myself. However, to not share it, in this time of greatest need for our world, would be an act of selfishness, and hiding, on my part, and I would dishonor the life that I now share with our Universe by keeping it too personal and secret.
Thirty years ago, beginning on May 24th, and extending through July 21st, I had a series of three spiritual “events” which, to this day, guide and direct the consciousness presently unfolding within me.
May 24, 1987 Description of Experience (extreme edit version)
On May 24, 1987, as I was driving toward Beaverton to visit Randy Olson. Randy was a lifelong friend, fellow party monster, and rent sharing partner in 1986 when I contemplated, and then took the active steps towards committing suicide on January 28, 1986 and beyond. As I drove over the West Hills, a wonderful vision came to me. It was the vision of a loving mother, holding a baby, and I felt the love of this wonderful UNIVERSE for the first time in my lifetime (later, I was taught to understand that this energy is the Divine Feminine, of which our patriarchal world continues to suppress daily, and has successfully done so, more or less, for at least the last 2000 years).
There is the love we have for each other, for our friends, our pets, our children, our families, but this love that I felt flow into me, and through me, transported me into a heightened awareness, and awe. The beauty was too great to talk about, the feeling so overwhelming, so healing, so resurrecting. I had to stop my car on Canyon Blvd, exited the car, and I got down on my knees beside the road and prayed my thankfulness to a CREATIVE FORCE that finally had found me receptive, and open, to its presence.
I made it to Randy’s house, and I met with him for the first time since a particularly ugly alcoholic blackout event that occurred after the last time we drank together, in March. Randy could not believe his eyes, and he then stated:
“Bruce, what has happened to you? You look different, you look happy. You look at peace. You have changed!!!”
Yes, I had changed, or, more accurately, a Change was happening. I started talking to Randy about my experience, and Randy started to get tingling sensations up and down his spine. The hairs on his arms starting sticking up straight off of his arms! Randy exclaimed:
“Bruce, what is going on? When you talk, I start to tingle all over. What has happened?”
“Well, I think that I am having an experience with God, Randy.” I said.
Randy then said:
“Your God experience is not for me right now, but I sure am happy that you are having it, because you needed something different in your life really bad, and really quick!”
Oh, how right he was!
(the story goes on, but I will end it here).
Note: Randy died a lonely, alcohol use and cigarette smoking related death three years ago.
I have included this aspect of my personal life, because there is a direct connection between what unfolded in my personal life while being a masculine energy dominated alcoholic, and the patriarchal evil that is unfolding in our world today. Our world remains intoxicated by its masculine hubris, greed, insensitivity, and the continuing domination and subjugation of all feminine energy. And, the world is in the midst of its own collective march towards suicide, should ignorance, greed, and Trump style politics predominate.
Yet, there is hope. I found balance and healing in my own life, without using outdated religious fundamentalist modes of thought, which continue to pollute the minds and hearts of millions of Americans. The 700 Club on TV should be called the 666 Club, and Pat Robertson, and all of the other unconscious supporters of this nonsense, need to make way for the New Truth dawning in the minds and hearts of our Awakening America.
The Evangelicals who continue to obstinately support Trump have revealed their true colors to all thinking and feeling Americans, and I remain appalled by their collective ignorance, hatred, and collusion with anti-Christ principles. Many are now promoting “loyalty pledges” to their anti-Christ master, and who knows what the dangerous endpoint will be for this nonsense? I fear that the formation of the pseudo-Christian equivalent of “the Taliban” is happening right before our eyes.
Today I grieve. Not because my Facebook post will continue to be ignored by most of humanity, but because callous, hate filled masculine energy runs rampant in our world, victimizing and destroying sacred life in all forms, and profiting from our own destruction. And, much of our American religious landscape remains dominated by blind adherence to Patriarchy, and all of the evil that emanates from it.
“Some people just want to watch the world burn.”
My heart breaks, yet somehow, miraculously, love still lives.
Please, save yourself.
