I never knew what I was getting involved with when I offered to you all of my heart in friendship this year, having withheld so much of myself over the years. 2017 was the year when I finally learned how closely two male human beings could connect, and ultimately become Read more
“As you have been with me in life, so I will be with you in death.” I “heard” this statement in my heart, and whispered it to Marty’s body at his graveside service Saturday morning, with Jo and Jim accompanying me to his graveside. Dad’s caregiver called me to Read more
I have had the privilege and challenge of going through and sorting a lifetime worth of writings and papers from my parents, and from myself. After reading some of my mother’s personal writings, I was struck by the pain that she experienced remaining married to my father. He was not Read more
I have had an anxiety reaction recently. This is difficult to talk about, as I have always considered myself such a “together” person, especially since I began conscientiously practicing recovery from alcoholism in 1987. Right now, I have a tight throat, and I am a bit dizzy, and easily irritated Read more
Merry Christmas to all, and may we all have a more enlightened New Year, sans TREASON (Trump Related Extreme Anxiety Striking Our Nation). What can I say that has not already been said? A selfish, spiritually and socially corrupt, dangerous, sad, and pathetic excuse for a human being is now Read more
NRA and the politicians who do not act to reduce the proliferation of automatic weapons are sponsors of national terrorism. Just how many automatic weapons does it take to make America’s gun owners feel safe? It is just that many weapons that it takes to make America unhealthy, insane, Read more
NRA (No Reasonable Alternatives) How much is enough, American male? This article, though not quite up to date, carries some painful truths about masculinity, entrenched power, the #metoo movement, and gun violence. Our national disgrace seems to arise from Toxic Masculinity, a topic that does not get the press it Read more
It was June 22, 1987, and I was hiking up to Larch Mountain, a beautiful peak that overlooks the Columbia River valley. From its elevated vantage point it oversees all of the major mountain peaks of the area. In the ancient times, I was to learn several years later, this Read more
Death is a short-term, medium term, and an eternity event. The sense of loss at losing my ability to walk, to run, to bike, to participate in group activities, to get up off of the couch without worrying about permanently damaging what little healing that I have accrued since my Read more
I am serving up a little vitriolic monologue today. “Dirt” bags come in many forms, and not all are attached to vacuum cleaners. Rep. Nunes certainly has earned the Dirt-Bag Award of the Year, so far. An informed observer might think that Devin Nunes himself is colluding with the Read more
Please Ignore, if you must, listen with your heart, if you can trust! Our POTU$ has unleashed more hatred and anxiety than any president in recent memory. Congratulations to the Commander of Thieves (oops, I think that I mean Commander-in-Chief). TREASON: Trump Related Extreme Anxiety Stalks Our Nation Read more
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mYlwF0jP5-w&feature=share Remember those late night television commercials in the 1960’s and 1970’s, where Tom Peterson would come on the air, and knock on the inside of the screen of our TV’s, yelling “WAKE UP! WAKE UP!!” ? This is John Lennon’s equivalent in song, without the sales pitch to buy Read more
I was asked on my birthday in 2017 what my most “memorable” birthday was, and here, to the best of my recollection, is an account of the near death experience.. I was 21 years old, and my best friend at that time, Dan Dietz (RIP), and John Durkin, went Read more
We visited Mom and Dad’s grave site today for the first time since dad’s death. (Rocky and Peaches are buried with them, too). One of Dad’s favorite expressions about people who get ignored, rejected or neglected was that “he got the bum’s rush”. His dementia in the last years of Read more
I first met Marie Schmidt, a diminutive old woman in her late eighties, in July of 1987. She hosted a weekly meeting at the downtown YWCA, which she played one hour tapes every Sunday, since 1961. I had seen a simple advertisement for her tape group, while attending the International Read more
This story is a thumbnail sketch of my relationship with Randy, and with the recovery process from the human condition, including my suffering, isolation, insanity, loneliness, and ALCOHOLISM AND DRUG ADDICTION). Friends and family, there is nothing new here, so please do not feel obligated to read this again, I Read more
Two poems for our present time. 1). The Wall HumpT DumbT sat on hate’$ wall, HumpT DumpT is about to have a great fall. All of Mercer’$ dark billion$, and all of Putin’$ tech henchmen, Will not be able to put Trump’$ regime back together again. 2). Read more
I get questioned from time to time about why I need to write about doing personal inventory and remaining “mindful” around the impact of Toxic masculinity upon my life, and upon the human race in general. Some perceive that I must have anger or hatred motivating me for “attacking” our Read more
I am deeply disturbed by the present developments within our shared world, within my individual and our collective human consciousness, and the points of connection between the self and other, through language, religion, and philosophies that create oppression, repression, and personal and social disease. Starting within myself, I have seen Read more
I never chose this uneven life path of recovery from trauma, life chose it for me. I choose how to deal with the sights along the way, however. The amygdala in our brains under duress from trauma creates new paths, leading in unhealthy directions, when these issues that arise Read more