Some good points below, most of it is useless.
On the path of awakening, there are endless special sights for the soul to behold. Prayer, dreams, visions, and a deeper understanding of our histories can become integral parts of this eternally unfolding scenery.
I no longer seek light in the darkness. I have found my own light, one that dispels the shadows of others and of my own past. This book is my evidence and experience of a power and a life greater than any limited sense of self.
To find the light of truth, we must release ourselves from the control of the crowd—whether it’s the crowd of old thoughts or those who blindly follow others. Words like “strange,” “mystical,” and “transcendent” are often used to describe the phenomena associated with this spiritual liberation, a freedom that words struggle to define.
Theoretical physicists now recognize the possibility of alternate universes and enhanced connections within our own. I am saddened that humanity is becoming more dependent on technology for communication while failing to develop the sensitivity to connect with the shared energy that continuously flows between us. Our handheld devices, used for entertainment and self-hypnosis, often just perpetuate the past, offering no real alternatives to the corrupted choices humanity seems resigned to making.
Science defines the laws governing what we can observe, but unlike enlightened spirituality, it offers no principles to predict or support humanity’s potential. We won’t fully understand quantum mechanics until we replace our self-centered perspective with the understanding that both the collective and the individual exist within each of us at every moment. The impact we have on one another is not yet fully understood, but practices like prayer, meditation, and mindfulness prepare the mind for the unknown, where all true creation originates. Being human is a far more collaborative effort than our conscious minds currently grasp. Ultimately, science, religion, medicine, and technology will unite as expressions of mankind’s true being.
Our “thoughts and prayers” hold life-affirming potential, yet their power is insignificant compared to the underlying intentions of our collective consciousness. One need only witness the mind-numbing statements from 2nd Amendment promoting Christians, politicians and gun dealers after daily acts of gun violence to understand this. I want no part of their abhorrent thoughts and prayers, which emanate from cowardly, hateful minds.
I have seen that our collective consciousness is filled with suggestions and temptations, many revolving around diseases of the body and mind, and the rejection of our spirit of love. Yet, within this mysterious energy field lies an infinite potential for healing and transformation. The path to conscious awareness and “miraculous healing” involves sorting our true thoughts from the stray noise of the human energy field and protecting ourselves from the dangerous frequencies we tune into, intentionally or not.
Can we experience a spiritual awakening where we accept a new way of being, of seeing life, and finally free ourselves from the limitations created by our time-based thinking? Can we approach life not from our conditioned backgrounds, our childhood wounds, or even our most educated minds? Will we allow ourselves the immense uncertainty—and ultimate privilege—of accessing new paths of consciousness where love, empathy, and compassion are our eternal companions? If we could move past our collective discomfort, we might learn something about mercy and justice and connect with a majesty that transcends our limited vision. We might finally know “God,” “Buddha,” “Allah,” and “Our Self” not as separate concepts, but as parts of a great whole.
To not do so is to continue our collective experience of war, hatred, economic inequality, racism, and mental illness. We are free to choose which energy to manifest. If we do not want the diseased status quo to lead to our collective Armageddon, we must all make necessary changes to the paths we now follow.
For I am about to create new heavens and a new earth; the former things shall not be remembered or come to mind.
— Isaiah 65:17
Always remember that WE—all of humanity—are the “I” in that verse, once we make conscious contact with the ultimate truth of existence.
I have attempted to capture lightning in a bottle by articulating this message. May none of us despair in our attempts to reach for this infinite energy and express its love. To live a better life, we must access new parts of our infinite self. A primary law of consciousness is that “we find what we are looking for,” so be sure to look for what you truly want, not what others suggest. We must explore spiritual possibilities, lest we remain addicted to our old ways of interpreting the world.
What is ‘prayer,’ and why is its healing potential so often disregarded? Are mystical and psychic events part of divine intention, or are they available to all? Are our dreams a connection to a higher possibility, or just a diversion while the body rests?
June 1972—First Rock Concert
I had an amazing experience of crowd energy at my first rock concert in 1971. When I walked into the Memorial Coliseum, with over 12,000 people attending, I had an apocalyptic experience. It was a miraculous event where my presence felt distributed over the entire crowd. If you have never experienced this, you cannot understand it. Over the years, I have found that I am sensitive to crowd energy—a palpable form of collective consciousness. I can feel the energy of groups and even draw from it or add to it if I am receptive.
June 22, 1987—“He is having an experience with God”
It was June 22, 1987, and I was hiking up Larch Mountain in the Columbia River valley. In ancient times, this area was sacred ground for indigenous peoples. I reached the top and quieted my mind. I slowly rotated 360 degrees, observing the incredible beauty and the peaks of Rainier, Adams, St. Helens, and Hood. It felt as if I were on top of a great observatory, alone with this special view.
My nervous system was still compromised from the methamphetamine I had ingested over the past 18 months. I had been clean for three months, but total recovery seemed impossible. I had physical tremors, almost like Parkinson’s disease, and was “hearing voices”—a delusional running monologue of my own thoughts.
A light, warm breeze carried the scent of pine, drawing me away from my problems. The mountain peaks and the river below began to feel closer. For the second time in a month, I started feeling “different.” A month prior, a “vision” had lifted my loneliness and depression, leaving a memory of unconditional love. Now, something was happening again.
A voice in my head stated, with its typical matter-of-fact nature, “HE IS HAVING AN EXPERIENCE WITH GOD.”
I was no longer separate from what I was viewing. Everything revealed itself as an extension of my own true nature. For the first time, I could see that all I will ever see is myself. I asked, “How will I see myself today?” I saw that all of humanity was my true family. I looked within and saw only peace. The third-person monologue had stopped. I held out my hands, which usually shook so badly I couldn’t write my name, and they were steady. Peace had found me.
I had finally found what real recovery is. It is not just stopping drugs and alcohol; it is the elimination of all thought patterns that keep me from caring for this world and all life upon it.
“WHERE ARE MY PEOPLE?” became the question of the day.
I drove to the US Postal Service’s EAP office and was greeted by Larry and Mike. When I said my name, they were blown away. I was ebullient, and Mike said I was “radiant.” I told them I was having a “spiritual experience,” and they hugged me.
Inspired, I went to the Main Post Office and made amends to the head of my old department for my poor performance. He listened warmly and shared that he wished his own son could discover what I had found.
One day, I saw my old psychiatrist, Dr. Dan Beavers, at Powell’s Books. He didn’t recognize me at first. “Bruce,” he said, “last time I saw you, I wondered how much longer you could survive.” I told him I had found a new way to live without medication, drugs, or alcohol. He congratulated me on my success.
August 1987—Marie Schmidt
In 1987, I met Marie Schmidt, an 87-year-old practitioner of the Infinite Way, a spiritual healing movement created by Joel Goldsmith. One day in 1989, after a devastating breakup, Marie offered me a “healing session.” I was skeptical but had nothing to lose. We meditated for 15 minutes. At the end, she spoke the message she heard from Spirit for me: “More perfect than you are, you could never be,” and “All that is human, is illusion.”
When I thanked her, I noticed I was totally at peace, “healed” of all my emotional turmoil. It was as if the winds of Spirit had blown everything away except peace and joy. As I look at my life’s history, I have been healed by its Mystery.
July 1990—Sharon and Hayley
In July 1990, I was having difficulty with my partner Sharon’s daughter, Hayley. One weekend, I spent the entire time in prayer and meditation about my troubles with her. Then, something unusual happened. I “heard” that my issues with Hayley were resolved. When I returned home, Sharon informed me that Hayley had decided to move out. As I look at my history, I see the workings of the Mystery.
November 1990—The Voice of Awakening
Sharon and I meditated and prayed together for hundreds of hours. The fruit of one shared meditation is the following poem. I had entered a profound state of connection, and upon returning to my conscious mind, the silence used words from my memory to create this message, completing a stanza I had written years earlier.
THE VOICE OF AWAKENING
Though the slowly shifting sands of time,
Create ever taller hills for this lost soul to climb,
It must be in my selfish, hateful world of no reason or rhyme,
I must begin the search for Truth, to find the Love that is sublime.“Oh seeker of Truth, God’s high mount you would climb,
Though you now stumble through the valley’s shifting sands of time.
Stop confusing your mind with worn out rhyme and reason,
For they are forever charged by Truth with treason!”(…)
“To be in realization of Truth, is to find God’s high mount another illusion to climb,
Created by fearful, desirous minds caught on the merry-go-round of time”
Summer of 1992—Lookinglass Lake
One morning in the summer of 1992, I awoke with heightened senses. Food tasted better, the air carried more scents, and my body felt alive. That evening, camping with Sharon in the Mt. Adams Wilderness, the feeling intensified. It was as if I had sensory receptors in the dirt, the sky, and the trees. I could not only see the ground, but FEEL it, as if I extended through everything I could see. It was a new form of the experience: “all that I can see is myself.”
Later that night, I awoke to a great light enveloping our tent. In the sky was a Great Light, bathing the area in a brilliance that eliminated all shadows, though it was near midnight. To this day, I don’t know if the light was connected to my heightened awareness or if it was a coincidental UFO. Looking back at my life’s history, I remain immersed in the light of its Mystery.
Prayer
If we could divest ourselves from our backgrounds for a moment, we could share in a greater unfolding. Prayer has been called focused thought, or our line of communication with a higher power. As our understanding evolves, we see these words point to something simple and natural, yet with a potential greater than most realize.
Our minds arise from a universal life force. We can access all its frequencies, but we must discern which to connect with and which to avoid. We access these frequencies together as a human race, which explains experiences like synchronicity, empathy, and even reincarnation—which may be an unusual sensitivity to the crystallized life history of a deceased person still vibrating in the universal spectrum.
One story stands out. I was in an electrician apprenticeship program from 1988-1992. A fellow apprentice, Gary Johnson, sometimes seemed distracted. One day, before an important test, I felt an intense desire to pray for him. After the test, Gary came to me and asked why I had prayed for him. Nobody could have known. Are we all connected? I stopped praying for co-workers after that, uncomfortable with the mystery. Gary died early the next year; he had been keeping his terminal diagnosis a secret.
Telepathy, prayer, and other psychic phenomena are all related. It’s too easy to dismiss this aspect of human potential. To find a real connection with love and joy, we must let go of envy, competitiveness, and the need to control others. We can let the natural peace at the center of our being decide what is best.
Summer of 1993—Pacific Palisades Retreat
In the summer of 1993, I attended a 5-day silent retreat with Eileen Bowden, a student of Joel Goldsmith. She would enter a sacred energy and give unprepared talks. Our role as listeners was to be in a meditative space to contribute to the experience. The result for me was total immersion in the sacred energy of the Spirit, with a quiet mind, perfect peace, and joy. This energy lasted a full week. I struggled to integrate this “enlightenment” into my work life, where my co-workers were so out of touch with what I considered sacred. Gradually, my “over-commitment” to spiritual unfoldment began to ebb.
Gary Mill and The Haunting
On December 23, 2017, we returned from a family dinner to watch the 1963 movie “The Haunting.” As I mentioned that I had first watched it as a boy with my friends Gary and Cindy Mill, I received a call from Gary at that exact moment. I hadn’t spoken to him since my dad’s funeral months earlier. As I search through my history, I always see evidence of the Mystery!
August 2018—Beryl’s Place
In August 2018, I rented a house at Black Butte for a trip with friends. I chose the unit online. When my friends asked why I wanted to pay for it, I replied it was a gift from my deceased father, Beryl. Upon arrival, we discovered the house had my father’s first name on the side, spelled correctly. This experience was truly a gift from Beryl.
Dreams as Teachers and Healers
I am not religious, but I believe dreams are one of a higher power’s primary ways of getting our attention. Awake or asleep, we respond to what we witness as if it has equal footing in reality. Here are six spiritually significant dream types:
- Visitation Dreams: A common experience after a loved one passes. They often appear healthy to communicate an important message: “I’m okay.”
- Prophetic Dreams: Many have had a “dream that came true.” Our dreams may use past experiences to show us patterns that help us make better choices.
- Warning Dreams: Our bodies can speak in dreams to warn of danger, especially regarding health. In one study, 44% of women diagnosed with breast cancer reported hearing “breast cancer” in a dream.
- Healing Dreams: These internal creations bring us into balance, often involving a mystical encounter.
- Heavenly Dreams: Over half of healthy young adults who dreamed of death spent time in heaven in that dream, often encountering deceased loved ones.
- Mutual Dreams: When two people dream of the same thing at the same time. Studies show they are often 80% identical.
The 1964 Dream
We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.
— Anaïs Nin
My most profound dream experience happened in 1964, at age nine. The main character was a priest from a time without technology. He received a new teaching on a mountaintop and returned to his village. He gathered the villagers and told them to throw every sacred golden figurine they owned into the lake and never think of them again. Then, he instructed each person to go into their home and face the “evil one” without protection.
The priest returned to his own home, stripped naked, and began to summon the forces of darkness. As he lifted his hands, sparks flew from his fingertips into a surrounding fog. His energy grew into a steady field, but fear began to take hold as he realized his life force could not last forever. He desperately strained to see the object of his fear. As his energy ebbed, a face began to materialize. Collapsing to the floor, he could no longer fight the undeniable truth—the face of the evil one might be his own.
This dream illustrates projection, where we realize the world we feared and created gods to protect us from was actually a world we created through our own ignorance. We are all wounded by this process. Ultimately, we heal together, or we die alone.
